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Wha a durty movie, de police dem know?

 We walked in to the theater, two young boys all excited to see the latest Ku Fu movies. I remember it well, it was at the Regal movies theater in Tanteen, I used to love going there. There I was, sitting in the dark, my heart pounding as I waited. I looked down at my lap, one pound bag of warm grounds, check, big box of Chiclets check, bottle of Pepsi Kol…a, check.  The lights dimmed ad a blast of sound erupted from the speakers.  I cracked some nuts and shoveled it into my mouth. Men in traditional Chinese costumes flew through, pow, slam, hi yaaa. A chop here a flying kick there. The crowd roared. Then the theater went black and slowly the movie started. There was a scene of a boat gliding through choppy waters, then the scene panned in, a man stood at the bow of the boat, his had on his waist like a pirate, his chest pushed out. The camera followed the deck and down to the belly of the boat. There were several women in there shackled , I was confused, why are all these white girls in a Kung Fu movie. Where is Silver Fox, Where is Golden Fox, where is Soji, and that funny one we used to can Cawn Set. The boat arrived at an island and the women were hoarded off. Oh the creams the complaining, the bad acting.  They were pushed into a hut that looked more like a 1930s makeshift army barracks. The women huddled up together and devised a plan of escape. Then the movie took a surprising turn, the women confronted the men and before we knew it they were moaning and growing, at first I was shocked, I looked around, everyone else seemed to be in shock also because the theater went into a dead silence. One of the women took her close off and that was when the theater exploded, men were screaming, “Tek it off,” women were scream, “Dat gal is ah slut,”  Dey booming, dey booming!!” I shouted, ground nuts and Chiclets flying everywhere as I bounced up and down in my seat. Rayphie had that look on his face like he was expecting Mommy Charles to walk in and then he would be in big trouble for letting his little brother see this. We sat through the whole movie, well we did not sit, there was a lot of clapping and screaming and shouting, “Dey doing stupidness, oh God dey doing stupidness,” When the movie was done, we walked by people, most of the men had they hands in their pockets, the women with their heads down, walking in shame. That day in school the movie was all the talk, everywhere you went there were groups of boys laughing, making dirty questers, planning to go to the movies. I had never seen boys soi happy in my life. That afternoon we walked by the theater, man, you should see the lines, they were back up on the hill leading to the GBSS school, down the road almost the lagoon. You could taste the anticipation in the air. From the Theater entrance, a road of boos and angry shouts was heard. The crowd parted and through the gauntlet of horny young men walked two police constables with the reels of the forbidden movie clutched in they evil paws. I head curse words I have never heard before and some I have never heard since.

By Bombastic Nation

Me name is Anderson A Charles. I am a writer story teller and Podcaster, the original Steve urkel, yes I did that. Also played basketball in college ( that's because I am seven feet tall.

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